October 1, 2oo8 and Barack Obama continues to trail McCain-Palin. The Democrats are in a panic. The news media are apoplectic. How could the Messiah not be running away with this? A pasty white senior citizen with a penchant for war is losing to the Dear One?
Bee-dee-beep, beeedeeedeeee beedeee: Here is the breaking news with all the news that is news across the nation:
I Joe Biden, with severe regret and deepest sadness come to you today to announce a personal tragedy. With severe ingrown hair plugs plaguing me, I must focus on my health, and will unfortunately be unable to serve as your vice-president. No, no. Please, please... you are too kind. I want nothing more than to fight for you as I've always fought for you. I want nothing more than to go to Washington---errr return to Washington---to begin--err resume-- my efforts to remake government. I thank you all for your kind wishes. God bless you. God bless America.
October 2, 2008 and Democrats are reeling. With the sudden, unexpected, and tragic loss of Joe Biden, the Democrat ticket is in a panic. The news media are apoplectic.
Bee-dee-beep, beeedeeedeeee beedeee: Here is the breaking news with all the news that is news across the nation:
I Hillary Clinton, with great humility and deepest respect come to you today to announce that upon great reflection, and in service to the nation, I have agreed to replace the ailing Joe Biden and fortunately serve as your vice-president. No, no... please, please... you are too kind. I want nothing more than to fight for you as I have always fought for you. I will go to Washington---errr return to Washington-- and do my best to be an imperfect replacement for the great Joe Biden. God bless you. God bless America.
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